I really believe that our problem is so much bigger than that. Out of the thousands of married Muslim that I know, and I know thousands, I’ve never come across not one Muslim man, even the newest Muslim man, who was an absolute dead beat, caring nothing for his wife or kids. Unless he was incapacitated. Although I have known some pretty-boy, gay acting dudes who never married for 20 years who were suspect. And I know a couple who have abandoned their families, their children while living the high single life. Some of them I suspected were closet gay, and that does exists among Muslim men, I’m sure. Some men are just jokers.
However, as an ummah, men and women fall short in equal measure and we are equally responsible for the dismal condition of Black Muslim America. Now that we are more aware of our state, waking up (again), it is up to us to change, to do better, to take a different path. Our issues now has more to do with wholesale ignorance of our religion and arrogant defiance of our own scriptures than anything else. Some people don’t want to change unless they can get a guaranteed seat at the front of the line.
We have ratchet men, and ratchet women in Black America of equal measures as well as in Black Muslim America of equal measure. But trust, me, the principle problem of Black Muslim America is not men not paying bills, nor so-called “lazy azz” women on welfare. We are so played. If we want to look a solutions, then we need to start by repentance for our past, and then look at application of our scriptural laws for order, in our personal lives, our family, and in communal governance, across the board. Basic Muslim thinking. We might want to look at stupidity too while we’re at it. Some folks simply missed too much school smoking weed and blunts. And be be all over the place. It’s just pathetic. First it was white man’s fault, then it was our trauma, then it was the immigrants, then it was white supremacy , then it was slavery, then it was economics, then it was the man, not stepping up (partially true), like our whole Black ummah got ADHD. Like little kids and shit. Going from one mini campaign to the other for the last 50 years. We’ve been through this conversation, twenty times before. No verses, no sharia, no order, no community, no accountability, no way forward for the man nor the woman because we’re too afraid to speak up or to have grown conversations. You need accountability of both at the same time.
Yeah if a husband has to ask his wife can he go in her fridge, and don’t ot his own fridge, then that’s his stupid ass. If a couple is living together playing house, not been married, or playing with Islam, then really, who gives a shit? Nothing should be expected of either one, its simply glorified fornication.
We’re living in the last days, still on stupid kiddie stuff, gender wars crap, following hidden hand scripts, don’t even know where it came from. In Muslim marriage, there are laws of governance, conduct, contractual guidelines and latitude. Whoever seeks other than what Allah has revealed, male and female, after knowing better, they are simply voluntarily astray, they get what they get. Case closed. And Allah knows best. That’s why He sent down the guidance, and sent Rasoolillaah (SAWS) has an example. And if all you get out of this is that I cussed, that’s on the reader. Lol. Gives me something to laugh about with my coffee.
Imam Abu Laith Luqman Ahmad.